Lacklustre

After watching movies as rang de basanti, there is a definite surge in the minds of many people; to do something, extraordinary.
But I ask, what if I want to do something? I do want to, but I am just not able to.
Whenever a movie portraying all those patriots is released, I have a feeling of guilt. I put myself in a predicament which I do not know how to get out of. I know that in five years, I will be in the US and paying taxes to the country who would have already charged me a bomb for the education there.
When my father gives me money to buy a painting for the house, he trusts that I would spend the money on a nice painting. If I get a bad painting, the next time he would go and get one himself, not tell me to buy.
We; at least I, have lost trust in the government I'm giving money to. But what do I do. I don't step into it, I keep paying. And I know the country is going to the dogs. But I am too scared to come forward and take something into my own hands.
I lack the courage. Because if someone does come forward, he will die in this vicious political circle. So it will probably need another few courageous people to save the country. I know I can't do it, unless I suddenly develop a will so strong that a miracle does happen.
This post is more of a confession. I today know that there are certain ties to me with my world, that will never let myself be carefree. And I believe that that is very necessary for someone to do something of such a stature.