Realization

Realization strikes, suddenly. After all the busy days of the past month, just yesterday, I was contemplating why I was behaving differently to certain circumstances which have occurred in the past.

I was never the expressive person. I used to be content even with no one around me, no one to talk to. I was never the expectant person. This has changed now.

I've become that extremely sociable person, who always needs people around to feel comfortable. I can't sit alone for hours now; not even with a book, my usual substitute for people. I know why this has happened. I've gotten close to a few people in the past few years, who've caused me to become this way. I do not know if it's for the better or worse; I'm just in a very uncomfortable territory right now. I need to know myself better.

That Siddhesh Mehra, who never cared what others thought of him, has started paying attention to it. I do not like it this way, but I do not know how much trying to turn myself back into the old me will change things.

For now, let me be.